Running In Fog: HeartLand Boating Humor
Last year about this time, I was doing a wee bit of shopping in a small, privately owned marine store. When possible, I like to shop in the small places. You never know what you’re going to find. It’s like a treasure hunt every single time. I was studying the wall of gadgets when a man came up beside me. I was shopping just for nifty stuff. Nothing special. Truth be told, I was bored that morning and would rather do a bit of boat shopping than mow the lawn. Anyway, this guy didn’t look like a boater. First of all, he was tense. Boaters are usually relaxed. He was dressed in pressed khakis with creases and an Oxford shirt buttoned all the way to the top. He had two cell phones attached to his belt, a phone thingy stuck to his ear and a satchel slung...
I think there’s a tattoo on my forehead that says “talk to me.” Everywhere I go, people tell me stuff. All sorts of stuff. I don’t know why…maybe they think I’ll be a good listener, which I try to be. Take right now, for instance. I’m sitting in the Subaru dealership getting the oil changed and the tires rotated on my Outback. The lady sitting next to me is named Melanie. She saw the sailboat charm on my necklace and began to talk to me. “My first date was on a boat,” she began by way of introduction. She had one finger pointed at my necklace, and the other hand was holding a paperback. “Hmmm,” I answered, noncommittally, smiling and listening. “I met him on Key Largo,” she continued,...